My favorite fellow-Substackers are Commander Salamander and Matt Labash, the former for his fearless patriotism and the latter for his right of center social commentary. Today’s Conservative Wahoo offering is an homage to the latter, in that he does semi-regular (I think it might be every Sunday) essays consisting of answers to emails that he has presumably received. In today’s essay, I will answer questions that no one in particular has asked me, but which deserve attention nevertheless. If you have my email address and want to ask me a question, please do. Or if you want to ask a question you believe deserves answering, write it in the comment section here.
Dear Wahoo,
What is going to happen in the 2022 Congressional Elections?
Sincerely,
Sleepless in Peoria
Well Sleepless, I haven’t a clue, and even if I did, I would neither ask me for it nor put any money on anything I might tell you. I believed for half of 2015 and most of 2016 that Donald Trump could never in a million years be elected President of the United States, and I went to bed the night of the election (at 8PM with a biography of Lincoln after being told at dinner by the fair Catherine that she had written me in for President) certain but unsatisfied that Hillary would be the next President.
For the longest time, I thought the GOP would walk away with both chambers in November and shortly thereafter, Joe Biden would pull an LBJ and say he was not going to run for re-election. Then we spent a few months watching the GOP (continue to) beclown itself in the people it ran and picked in primaries, we watched a (correct and correcting) Supreme Court decision energize the left, and we watched Chuck Schumer and Joe Manchin pull a fast one on Cocaine Mitch and dump a giant spending bill into the system after the GOP had already agreed to a DIFFERENT giant spending bill. But most importantly, we watched the 1/6 Commission lay before us the insurrection that Donald Trump conjured, publicized, planned, summoned, exhorted, and led using NOTHING BUT the words of people who worked for him, people he appointed and people he created. I do not believe I go too far in stating that the 1/6 Commission slowly and methodically convinced a sufficient number of Americans that not only was Trump responsible, but that he was shielded and propped up by the GOP in Congress, and that whatever increasingly favorable view they held of the GOP as a check on the feckless Biden Administration, they just cannot see themselves pulling the lever for this group dominated by invertebrates.
This is all a long way of saying I think the House flips but the Senate doesn’t. Six months ago I would have said both would flip, in a wave.
Dear Wahoo,
Galley-up or Galley Down?
Unsure
Galley-up, and this one is not even close. What we’re talking about here is the arrangement of spaces on one’s cruising vessel, and whether it is acceptable to own a boat in which the cook/chef is isolated from all the fun on the main deck. If you believe that the cook/chef is a servant to the other cruisers, or if he or she is a wet blanket socially, well I guess a galley-down configuration is acceptable. But who wants that person onboard? Instead, we should strive for cruising groups in which the cook/chef is also a central part of the conversation, where he or she can effectively “hold court” whilst dicing shallots for the French Country Chicken dish he’s whipping up. Sorta like this:
I can just SEE myself standing there at the sink pontificating on the immense learning that UVA Coach Tony Bennett showed from the 2018 tournament to the 2019 tournament, or the obvious choice of Diane Lane as the “non-Catherine if I were stranded on a desert island girl”.
Galley-down configurations (commonly seen in sailboats) relegate the cook to what Kipling referred to as a “galley-slave”. I write this with some hesitation, as later this week I’ll be in the galley working for my carriage in a friend’s lovely sailboat for a few days. His boat looks a lot like this:
While the working conditions are posh, unless everyone is down there with you sitting around the table (not enjoying the beautiful August Maine weather), you’re likely missing out on the cocktails in the cockpit.
Like most things in life, there is a middle way, not galley-up and not-galley down. I’m honestly not sure what they call this, but the galley is two or so steps down from the main salon, but the cook STILL gets to enjoy free communication with the other cruisers enjoying their Old Fashioneds. Here’s one on a Sabre 45 Salon Express
See that little nook there to the left of the pilot chair? Sorta works, no?
But unless you are in the sailboat market, galley-down configurations are to be avoided.
On to the next letter.
Wahoo,
You’re short, not very good-looking, could lose a few pounds, are pasty white, and you’re kind of a short-tempered curmudgeon. What is Catherine doing with the likes of you?
Jealous
This is an excellent question, one I ask myself quite a bit. Catherine is patient, kind, civil, lovely, attractive, active, competent, and adventurous. I am none of these things. We have been together for fifteen years now, and until this very day, I have not been able to figure it out. But I had an epiphany earlier this afternoon whilst checking out at Lowes after purchasing various and sundry pool and garden things.
She’s with me for the military discount at Lowes.
No essay next Monday, as I will be sailing with Catherine, Chris, and Carey and proving my suitability as a crew-member and fellow retiree.
Who knew you were such a misanthrope?
I will say that having the occasion to both travel significant distances and live aboard in both a galley up and galley down situation- as the primary chef and bottle washer I will always choose galley down. I like my work space unencumbered by muggles and anyone who doesn’t plan cocktail hour for when said chef can participate is likely going hungry on our boat!