It's the Christmas Season
Deal With It
All good Americans know that the Christmas Season begins on November 1st and extends through the end of the day on January 1st. Never fear, there are no expectations that good Americans take their Christmas decorations down through the haze of a New Year’s Hangover. But taking them down before the first is just not done.
There are no other good Americans in my household, and so the Christmas Season is observed properly only within the confines of my garage office until after Thanksgiving, when the sub-par Americans have decreed that decorating can begin. She Who Must Be Obeyed has made some noise this year about decorating early, as we’ll be heading to the Bahamas for a week and a half over Thanksgiving, and she’s enamored with the possibility of coming home to a Christmas wonderland. I have seen no evidence that this will be the case, but there are five days remaining, and she’s something of a miracle worker.
We’re headed to the Bahamas because that’s where Dash-2 works, and in a startling example of cultural disregard, the Bahamians do not celebrate Thanksgiving. We therefore bring it to her. We did this last year, and while there were no Turkeys readily available, there were some Bahamas-raised chickens, and I roasted two of them. Now, I am a chicken man, and I know how to cook chicken like nobody’s business. But these birds were downright TOUGH. Nearly inedible. Not sure what the plan is this year, but I’ll be lobbying for seafood which seems to be something done well there.
The consensus view last year was that I behaved poorly during our Thanksgiving trip to the tropics, and to a large extent, the consensus was right. When I was presented with the idea of decamping to the islands during what for me is a sacred time, I wasn’t thrilled. But I’d been working hard, and saw the opportunity to sorta check out as worth taking. I made it very clear to my ladies that I was not really going to “DO” anything while I was there but relax, eat, and go for a daily run. Everyone slapped the table and agreed that this was a capital idea. The PROBLEM though, was that I upheld my end of the bargain. I did NOTHING, and they never really took me seriously. “Hey, do you want to come with us to this really great beach an hour away?”. No. This dwelling sits on a really nice beach. And there’s a pool. “We’re going to drive and hour and fifteen minutes on dangerous roads (in cars with steering wheels on the wrong side) to eat at this cute little restaurant, are you coming with us?” No. I’ve got plenty of food here and I’m really into this fantastic Hallmark Christmas movie. I think the Hallmark Christmas movies was what put them over the edge. I watched several a day for the entire time. When they wanted to play dominoes, I watched Christmas movies.
In retrospect, being true to myself (and spectacularly selfish) was a less than ideal approach, and I have assured my family that I will be more cooperative this year. I will play games, I will put my tablet down and be a responsible Hallmark Christmas viewer, and I will participate like a normal human. I will NOT be taking my life into my hands to ride on the wrong side of terrible roads in order to go to a beach—or any other trip that is not to an airport, a grocery store, or a restaurant.
All of this is in a roundabout way of letting you know not to expect regular Monday essays on on the 25th and December 2nd. I will likely drop some updates while we vacate, and later this week I’m planning a bit of Navy writing. But please, don’t allow my absence to keep you from your duty as a good American to get busy celebrating Christmas.
Status Report
In this space last week, I laid out my strategy for living the next few decades of my life. I appreciate many of the comments and some of the real-life discussions I’ve had with readers. That said, it appears that I was either unclear or unpersuasive with some of it—or I need to fill some in—so a bit of reinforcement follows.
There have been a number of comments that amount essentially to “now is not the time to give up” and “there is a need for people like you to keep being heard”. While it is gratifying to read and hear those comments, they aren’t particularly responsive to the stimuli I am responding to. First of all, my plan is to be implemented throughout the whole of 2025, so I’m really not making any precipitous moves just yet. The Navy stuff I write about will likely be unchanged, and the glimpses of everyday life (or the everyday life of a curmudgeonly gnome) will continue. What I’m going to immediately pull back on are the commentaries about non-defense policy and politics. There is real unease and some anger at the heart of much of that writing, and I simply don’t want to marinate in that anymore. For example, I was in California earlier this week and had a phone chat with Catherine, who had earlier in the day been in conversation with one of our good friends who was curious about what I thought about the nominee for Secretary of Defense. Like a lot of you, I was aware of it, and like some of you, I had developed an opinion, the kind of opinion that prior to last week’s essay, I would likely have developed into some kind of content, either Twitter-based or maybe even right here in this ole blog. Instead, I tried to shake it off. I absolutely forbade myself from extensive writing on it, and I tried as best as I could to remember that I wanted to engage in things where I had the ability to make positive change. So I told Catherine (briefly) what I thought, but that this was exactly the kind of thing that I was going to try and de-emphasize in my life going forward.
Further to the unease and anger stuff, I’ve watched with interest over the past ten days as people I once respected, and who I believed once operated with a modicum of good judgment, either twisted themselves into rhetorical pretzels trying to defend indefensible nominations, or just skipped the twisting altogether and flat out shilled for them. As I read their words, I could feel the anger. But that was the signal that I needed to throttle back, remember that fish gotta swim, and just concentrate on the world that I can be helpful in.
I spent a good forty minutes or so this week in conversation with a young man I think the world of, in a conversation that left me a considerably better man than I was when it began. We didn’t talk about work, politics, policy, nothing about that. We talked about dating, love, family…and it was a delight. He’s in his late twenties with the world at his feet, and I was really taken by his maturity, his humanity, and his basic human kindness. The exchange caused me to think more deeply about how I relate (or don’t) to other people, and the degree to which I REALLY pay attention when I’m in conversation. I’m all in on the whole Marcus Aurelius/Eckhard Tolle “be present” mantra—especially as I try and roll in the scan.
As for this venue and its continuation, I was probably unclear. I think I’d LIKE to keep writing, I’m just not sure once I move away from politics and national defense, how interesting the stuff I put out will be. I don’t want to turn into Andy Rooney (sorry kids), but I can see that coming.
Old Friends
Further to the whole “get my ass in gear” plan is to luxuriate in the warmth of great friendships, and last Friday I did just that, meeting up with Tom, Rob, and John to watch our Virginia Cavalier Men’s Basketball Team in action against Villanova in Baltimore.
It wasn’t easy to corral this bunch, but we pulled it off. For over forty years, this foursome has been there for each other. Marriage. Divorce. Birth. Death. Joy. Pain. The whole enchilada. I texted them Friday morning that I had the anticipation of a little boy on Christmas morning, and it was the honest truth.
You could try brining the chicken for a couple days, might help. Have a wonderful time.
Our g-daughter keeps us honest wrt Christmas decorating. She was here last night, dragged out our 3' tree and plugged it in. As we were knee deep in making pizza, I negotiated a delay in finding the ornaments until family dinner next week. She agreed, and you know I best have those boxes out before they arrive, along with all the other things that get put out.