I was in my undergrad and graduate school years in the 90s. I was being a self indulgent college student and racking up debt and a series of poorly chosen and tragic relationships that had no possible positive ending. I had no idea what was happening in the world, either. I don't really have a concept of what I was like as a person except I was concerned for the entire decade with being very fit and always being impeccably dressed. I did not own jeans - not a single pair.
In my early 30s, mid 00s, I met you. I remember that, OF COURSE.
I don't think I became myself until I had kids in my mid 30s, but I lost a 10s decade of any part of life beyond the homefront to surviving 4 births in 5 years and getting past toddlerhood for all of them. Then - after we hit late 10s maybe it was the first time I started paying attention to the world past them and past me.
I was pretty into popular culture and music in the 90s, though. I'm a vault for the lyrics of many 90s and 00s albums especially if they are soul crushing songs about love that must end. In the 2010s was the four babies thing - I recall nothing of the 2010s. Was there music? Television? Work? I don't know
We're not too far apart in age, but the 90s are a semi-blur, especially the latter half when I worked on the Hill and we were too busy saving the world to watch Friends. Though Bosnia was a daily event for me since I was in the midst of foreign policy debates. That progressively worsened in the aughts from 9/11 (I didn't get to watch any of it from a television set) to "hiking the Appalachian Trail" - I never watched Breaking Bad until 2019. Based on all reports, I didn't miss nearly as much as I worried.
I think pop culture is a commonality for people to talk about or pass the time in some less than meaningful way as a break from the less idyllic world that surrounds us. There are a select few asked to stand a post living with memory gaps that shock people in social gatherings.
As always, your brilliant post challenged me to stop and think.
Actually, I think it’s relatively common among certain types of people to check out of pop culture to some extent in a similar period in life. I’m 25 and never had a great deal of interest in modern pop culture (other than briefly in middle school). Not all of it is bad. But late in college, my interest dove off a cliff. Ever since college, I really have been missing much of the late 2010s/early 2020s. I only learn about new artists/movies/shows from friends or family (including my Boomer parents) or from reading something in the news.
Maybe I’m wrong, but it feels like the half-life of new musicians is measured in days now and much of what gets produced in music/film/television isn’t very good. Much of the music I like came out well before I was born. So if this is my 90s, I’m missing it too.
As to the 1990s specifically, I was born in the 90s (late Millennial not Gen Z, thank you very much) and have no political or cultural memory of that decade. My earliest political memory was 9/11. So the 90s has always been my historical blindspot - I learned more in school about the 70s and 80s and only later understood the politics and history of the period before I was born and right after that. So, in some ways, I “missed” the 90s, too, and I’ve been playing retrospective catch-up to try to fill in that blindspot ever since.
As a man who loves Christmas so much as you do, (and you know my love of all things Dutch) - here is a bit of David Sedaris that if I did not share, I would feel I let you down as a friend. Let him explain the unique Dutch Christmas tradition to you in a way only Sedaris could: https://youtu.be/UCUHTDrca4s
Awesome thread. 90s kid here (b. 1982), grew up in Germany. Two things come to mind as I read this;
1. I soaked up everything and anything on America I could get in those pre-internet days. NBA/ Chicago Bulls matches in the middle of the night, any documentary on America, and any piece of the evening news that dealt with America and the world (perhaps an early interest in defense, as I clearly remember a lot of the cruel images from Desert Storm to Somalia). I also watched The Simpsons. They taught me more about American pop culture than anything else. Still, when I went to a 90s party at the 9:30 Club in DC in 2011, I was so utterly alone and disappointed - I didn't know ¾ of the songs!
2. I'm spending recent weeknights re- watching old "Year in Review" from Germany, traditionally released on Christmas to reflect on the year just passed. It started in '82 (sic!), I've moved to 2003. Chilling, what the contemporaries deemed important and what not. Their hopes on the singularity of terror or the prospect of new technology - in hindsight, 20/20. Then again, tremendous foresight auch as on the rise and character of Putin. And, to your point, I had forgotten about a number of pop culture things that happened or passed me by in the 90s.
I feel much more at home in the 80s, which is weird given that I was much too young then. Maybe some deeper introspection is in order . Your piece kicked it off.
Bryan - You are definitely not alone. I also missed much of the 90s. I started them on the USS Cushing (Gunnery Officer, MPA, Nav) and finished them working in the fly fishing industry in Last Chance, ID. I know nothing about Seinfeld or Friends or the Bulls or much of anything else that happened pop culture-wise in that decade. But I don't feel like I missed much. Best - Jamie
Bryan,... My wife and kids accuse me of being an 'old man' before my time for many years. I grew up overseas in 70/80s for the most part and was 'stuck' listening to my dad's music and watching his favourite movies - don't get me wrong I LOVE both to this day. But, I never associated with the 90s. I did get in to the TV shows that started while I was still in college, but the latter 90s are a blur (mostly because of sea duty or Navy commitments, and like you a lot of beer drinking). Looking back, I am not sure I really 'missed' the 90s,... Not much redeeming from it in my estimation.
Bryan, greatly enjoyed this piece. Reminded me of my wife's often muttered retort to my questioning some trendy obsession of our children during the 90s, to wit: "you never had an adolescence. You went from childhood to straight to adult, joining the Navy 13 days after our high school graduation. She also thinks I missed the entire culture, not just of the 90s, but the 70s-2010. Harsh? Cheers, Doug
I was in my undergrad and graduate school years in the 90s. I was being a self indulgent college student and racking up debt and a series of poorly chosen and tragic relationships that had no possible positive ending. I had no idea what was happening in the world, either. I don't really have a concept of what I was like as a person except I was concerned for the entire decade with being very fit and always being impeccably dressed. I did not own jeans - not a single pair.
In my early 30s, mid 00s, I met you. I remember that, OF COURSE.
I don't think I became myself until I had kids in my mid 30s, but I lost a 10s decade of any part of life beyond the homefront to surviving 4 births in 5 years and getting past toddlerhood for all of them. Then - after we hit late 10s maybe it was the first time I started paying attention to the world past them and past me.
I was pretty into popular culture and music in the 90s, though. I'm a vault for the lyrics of many 90s and 00s albums especially if they are soul crushing songs about love that must end. In the 2010s was the four babies thing - I recall nothing of the 2010s. Was there music? Television? Work? I don't know
We're not too far apart in age, but the 90s are a semi-blur, especially the latter half when I worked on the Hill and we were too busy saving the world to watch Friends. Though Bosnia was a daily event for me since I was in the midst of foreign policy debates. That progressively worsened in the aughts from 9/11 (I didn't get to watch any of it from a television set) to "hiking the Appalachian Trail" - I never watched Breaking Bad until 2019. Based on all reports, I didn't miss nearly as much as I worried.
I think pop culture is a commonality for people to talk about or pass the time in some less than meaningful way as a break from the less idyllic world that surrounds us. There are a select few asked to stand a post living with memory gaps that shock people in social gatherings.
As always, your brilliant post challenged me to stop and think.
Actually, I think it’s relatively common among certain types of people to check out of pop culture to some extent in a similar period in life. I’m 25 and never had a great deal of interest in modern pop culture (other than briefly in middle school). Not all of it is bad. But late in college, my interest dove off a cliff. Ever since college, I really have been missing much of the late 2010s/early 2020s. I only learn about new artists/movies/shows from friends or family (including my Boomer parents) or from reading something in the news.
Maybe I’m wrong, but it feels like the half-life of new musicians is measured in days now and much of what gets produced in music/film/television isn’t very good. Much of the music I like came out well before I was born. So if this is my 90s, I’m missing it too.
As to the 1990s specifically, I was born in the 90s (late Millennial not Gen Z, thank you very much) and have no political or cultural memory of that decade. My earliest political memory was 9/11. So the 90s has always been my historical blindspot - I learned more in school about the 70s and 80s and only later understood the politics and history of the period before I was born and right after that. So, in some ways, I “missed” the 90s, too, and I’ve been playing retrospective catch-up to try to fill in that blindspot ever since.
As a man who loves Christmas so much as you do, (and you know my love of all things Dutch) - here is a bit of David Sedaris that if I did not share, I would feel I let you down as a friend. Let him explain the unique Dutch Christmas tradition to you in a way only Sedaris could: https://youtu.be/UCUHTDrca4s
Bryan,
Awesome thread. 90s kid here (b. 1982), grew up in Germany. Two things come to mind as I read this;
1. I soaked up everything and anything on America I could get in those pre-internet days. NBA/ Chicago Bulls matches in the middle of the night, any documentary on America, and any piece of the evening news that dealt with America and the world (perhaps an early interest in defense, as I clearly remember a lot of the cruel images from Desert Storm to Somalia). I also watched The Simpsons. They taught me more about American pop culture than anything else. Still, when I went to a 90s party at the 9:30 Club in DC in 2011, I was so utterly alone and disappointed - I didn't know ¾ of the songs!
2. I'm spending recent weeknights re- watching old "Year in Review" from Germany, traditionally released on Christmas to reflect on the year just passed. It started in '82 (sic!), I've moved to 2003. Chilling, what the contemporaries deemed important and what not. Their hopes on the singularity of terror or the prospect of new technology - in hindsight, 20/20. Then again, tremendous foresight auch as on the rise and character of Putin. And, to your point, I had forgotten about a number of pop culture things that happened or passed me by in the 90s.
I feel much more at home in the 80s, which is weird given that I was much too young then. Maybe some deeper introspection is in order . Your piece kicked it off.
Bryan - You are definitely not alone. I also missed much of the 90s. I started them on the USS Cushing (Gunnery Officer, MPA, Nav) and finished them working in the fly fishing industry in Last Chance, ID. I know nothing about Seinfeld or Friends or the Bulls or much of anything else that happened pop culture-wise in that decade. But I don't feel like I missed much. Best - Jamie
Bryan,... My wife and kids accuse me of being an 'old man' before my time for many years. I grew up overseas in 70/80s for the most part and was 'stuck' listening to my dad's music and watching his favourite movies - don't get me wrong I LOVE both to this day. But, I never associated with the 90s. I did get in to the TV shows that started while I was still in college, but the latter 90s are a blur (mostly because of sea duty or Navy commitments, and like you a lot of beer drinking). Looking back, I am not sure I really 'missed' the 90s,... Not much redeeming from it in my estimation.
Bryan, greatly enjoyed this piece. Reminded me of my wife's often muttered retort to my questioning some trendy obsession of our children during the 90s, to wit: "you never had an adolescence. You went from childhood to straight to adult, joining the Navy 13 days after our high school graduation. She also thinks I missed the entire culture, not just of the 90s, but the 70s-2010. Harsh? Cheers, Doug
Great nostalgic read on an early train to Boston.